Sunday, February 17, 2013

Appreciating Solitude

Today I passed along a shift at work, and took the day to myself. I stayed in bed for as long as I wanted, went to the grocery store to stock up my fridge, snacked and cooked, and then went back to bed with a cup of Apple Cinnamon tea and the latest Real Simple and HGTV magazines. As old jazz records played in the background, I wrapped my curtain around an old pipe, allowing the deceiving winter sunlight into my messy, homey, peaceful studio. It has become a place of refuge, and although it is not yet put together and not yet perfect, I have become extremely protective of this place. It has become my sanctuary, a place of healing and growth. A total of roughly five people have seen its inside since I moved in this past November. This space is filled with pictures of loved ones, old books, scented candles, and odds and ends that I have collected along my way. It's funny how a safe space allows you the freedom to think and say whatever is on your mind. There's something magical about being at home, under the blankets or curled up on the couch and just letting loose. It's something you can't do at a coffee shop, at the park or at a restaurant.

I've come to appreciate the time I have alone. Reflection has become precious to me, as I have come to find that I have so much to be grateful for: friends, family, trust, work, creativity, food, my own apartment, honesty, public transportation, my body, my voice, variety and people in general. It's days like this where I find myself realizing how I have grown since I moved into this apartment, and since I moved to New York. And it's days like this where I realize all the things that people say to me that are sweet lessons I don't realize in the moment. Here are just a few of those lessons, and just the ones that I can think of in this moment. I'll share them as they were worded to me. To those of you who shared these words of wisdom with me, Thank you. Your vulnerability and sincerity are the best gifts. 

On Money: "You can't take it with you when you die."

On Community: "There's something amazing happening here."

On People: "It's something rare that most people don't possess and it's refreshing."

On Friendship: "Thank you for always pushing me and always seeing in me what I finally saw in myself."

On Support: "Sometimes I know what people need better than they know themselves."

On Love: "I call her my fuckercita because she's my little fucker and I love her."  

On Sex: "When I'm frustrated, I just start dancing. It always helps."

Stay tuned for more blog posts. Coming soon.....apartment renovation pictures and posts.

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